Basically, we want 3 children and we'd like them to be close to one another in age. This seems like it would be difficult health and comfort-wise for my wife. So, I started thinking what if we could hire 3 surrogate mothers so that we could spare her the difficulty of pregnancy, keep her figure, and have 3 either simultaneously or very close to one another in age.
I realize this is radical and we're VERY unlikely to do this. But just out of curiosity, I'd like to hear what people have to say about it.
I'm not religious, so I find religious aspects of this question uninteresting. Also, financially, it's uninteresting because either one can afford it, or can't.
What is your opinion about it morally, psychologically, etc.?Using surrogate mothers for comfort, beauty, and convenience?
I think it would be a bad idea. First, a woman can have pregnancies close together resulting in children close in age. Second, the "discomfort" involved in having a baby has been one of the most rewarding thing ever! Psychologically - not a good idea. Pregnancy allows the mother to bond with her child in ways that not bearing her own child would ever permit. Re: keeping her figure - it sounds vain. Women can lose the weight - I lost all my pregnancy weight + an additional 30 lbs in 2 months after having my son.
Good luck
You sound way to selfish to be a parent. Please don't do it. If you are that shallow and vein I can't imagine you'd want to wipe a poopy bum or a snotty nose, or would you hire someone for that too?Using surrogate mothers for comfort, beauty, and convenience?
My first question is what does your wife think of this hypothetical plan?
Because really, it's up to her to decide whether or not she thinks the discomfort etc is an issue
Secondly I need to question whether a person who is not prepared to sacrifice all of the things you mentioned would be able to make the sacrifices that are required when the baby actually arrives.
Finally, I can't help but wonder why someone wouldn't want to experience the beauty of pregnancy and childbirth... sure it is hard and uncomfortable and can mean some major physical changes but it is also one of the most amazing things I've been through and I can't wait to do it again
I understand that there are differences in opinions for everyone so I am not saying it is wrong but I just couldn't understand surrogacy if it weren't necessary
men and women are very very different, physically, emotionally and pretty much any other ally you can think of.
Your wife is probably very good at understanding why she would not want a surrogate to birth her children. What is happening is that you cannot understand what or why she feels this way, thus your thoughts of she cannot explain why she feels this way.
She can explain it just perfectly. You need to actually listen and accept what is said as it is said and not try to turn it into your own thoughts and ideas of how and what she feels.
When a medical need is present, a woman can resign herself to the fact that if she wants a child, she will have to find an option other than birthing her own. If she is with a controlling male, she may or may not let him control her fertility and how and when she has a child.
Eventually she will find herself looking for someone who will give her what she was created to want and desire and that is a child of her own , birthed by her and held by her for the first time after a long wait and plenty of kicks, rolls and heartburn, but all worth every bit of it.
If the male leaves her because of her figure, well, he was only a doner anyway, not much there to love for the long haul after all.
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