Do surrogate mothers feel any kind of emotional attachment to a baby they gave birth to for someone else?

How can they do such a brave, generous thing?Do surrogate mothers feel any kind of emotional attachment to a baby they gave birth to for someone else?
I imagine that they do feel some attachment, but they go into it knowing that this baby belongs to someone else.



I think its an incredibly noble thing to do.Do surrogate mothers feel any kind of emotional attachment to a baby they gave birth to for someone else?
Everyone is different, but most women who feel they would easily attach to the surrogate child will not become surrogates for this reason. In order to become a surrogate, you must have had at least one child of your own so you know ahead of time how you felt during pregnancy and if this is a good option for you.



I have been a surrogate twice before, and am currently pregnant with a third surrogate child. I have also had two children of my own. In my experience, the surrogate pregnancies are very different than the pregnancies with my own children. You know going in that the child is not yours, so there are no surprises. Usually, the child is not biologically related to you and this also helps you keep your emotional distance. Id say the biggest factor in not attaching to the child happens naturally. You aren't decorating a nursery, framing ultrasound photos, choosing baby names, etc. These are all ways in which a family bonds with the baby before it is even born. A surrogate mother isn't doing these things - the intended family is.



I am also the Director of a Surrogacy Consultant Service (ReproMatch) and so in addition to my own surrogacy experiences, I work with surrogates and intended families everyday. I see the surrogate becoming attached to the family and the attention she receives from them more often than I see her becoming attached to the child.



If a woman is interested in helping a childless family or person but fears she may become attached to the baby, there is always egg donation.



There are more resources and answers to questions about surrogacy on my company's website. http://repromatch.com